Countering Meanness with Kindness

FriendsWhen someone is having a bad day, they may lash out at you just because you are there, not because you had done anything to invoke their anger. It is unfortunate when someone behaves in this manner; however, we are all human and, at times, our emotions get the best of us.

Reasons behind Hurtful Behavior and Our Reactions
Exhaustion, highly stressful situations, feelings of oppression, rejection, and other strongly negative contributing factors make us more susceptible to lashing out at whoever is within our vicinity. The longer a person is subjected to negative conditions, the more distraught they may become. In fact, they may not even seem to behave like themselves because they are having a hard time moving beyond a state of distress. Your instinctive response may be to fire back at the person in an effort to protect or defend yourself. This is because you may feel threatened in some way by their behavior, as anger can be perceived as an attack. It is under these conditions that people on the receiving end of a person’s negative and uncharacteristic behavior should try to take a step back before replying with more anger, which may lead to an escalated exchange of negative energies, as well as damaged or broken relationships.

Assess the Situation before Reacting
Before responding, try to look at the situation from the other person’s point of view. What is going on with them that they would lash out at you for what seems to be no reason? This behavior can be a cry for help. It can also be that this person is harboring a lot of negative feelings within themselves that they are having a hard time handling. A person who lashes out is usually feeling a tremendous amount of pressure and stress, and like anything else, that pressure needs to be relieved or it will cause an explosion. Instead of responding with anger that will feed into the existing pressure, do your best to respond with kindness and compassion, even if the person does not appreciate it at the time. In this way, you may stop the escalation of anger and prevent it from infecting you. Your understanding and empathy may be the very act of kindness this person needs to relieve their stress and realize just how badly they were behaving toward others who did not deserve it.

Ask for Assistance from Above
If you are having difficulty dispensing kindness in the face of someone else’s hurtful behavior, ask your heavenly support team to help you to increase your compassion toward others. In addition, ask them to help the person who is in distress, as they are the ones most in need of assistance. Send the distressed person love and light from your heart and spirit, and request that they receive the healing they need to relieve them of the distress and pent up anger in order to live a happy and satisfied life.

What Is Inside of You?
If you find it is you who is lashing out at others and walking around with anger in your heart and mind, then it is time to take an in-depth look at what is really bothering you, and apologize, if possible, to those that you hurt.

To discover what is going on, the first step is recognizing and identifying the true problem. For example, getting extremely angry at your partner for leaving their socks on the floor after asking them several times not to, may only be a surface trigger that signals the existence of a deeper problem, such as of a sense of not being heard or appreciated at work and at home. Often, it is miscommunications and misunderstandings that lead to problems within relationships. By examining and uncovering the true problems, you can begin to work on positive solutions to heal them.

The second step is to look for solutions that will improve the circumstances that are causing the problems. Are there actions you can take to improve your situation or remove yourself from it? If not, are there ways that you can change the way that you perceive the situations that will ease your emotional pain? It may seem as if there is no way out and that the problems are formidable; however, that line of thinking can be the product of limited thinking that is boxed in by only seeing the problem. Try your best to get past step one, and open your mind to various solutions. There are other options available. They may not always appear to be the options you want to take; however, if you can let go of your anger and stress long enough to clear your mind, you may discover that the options may lead you to better opportunities. Be sure to ask others for help. Brainstorm ideas with respected friends, family members, or colleagues. By being truthful with yourself and others as you go through this process, you will not only help yourself on a human level, but also on a soul level, as you evolve and develop through these empowering experiences.

The third step is to be kind to yourself. If you are working to the point of exhaustion, take a step back. A break from the stressful situations will allow you time to refresh and look at situations with a more relaxed state of mind. Most important of all, ask your heavenly support team of God, the archangels, past spiritual masters, spirit guides, and loved ones in spirit, to help you. They are eager to lend a hand, and will do so if you ask for their assistance and are open to receiving their help. Sometimes, too, when you leave an opening for your heavenly support team to help out, they may just solve the problem for you through the presentation of new opportunities.

Multiply the Kindness in the World
As you go throughout your day, keep in mind that we are all human, we all make mistakes, and we are all doing the best we can under the circumstances that affect our lives. By countering meanness with kindness, we provide opportunities to make positive contributions that have the potential to bring healing to our lives and the lives of others.

Namaste!

With Light and Love,
Karen T. Hluchan

Spirit Medium, Motivational Speaker, Reiki Master, & Author of How Have You Loved?

www.HealingSpiritWithLove.com

Set Yourself Free through Forgiveness

Set Yourself Free Through ForgivenessWhether it is painful events in the recent past or from as far back as childhood, emotional, mental, and spiritual trauma can be released from your spirit through forgiveness of the person or people involved, including yourself.

Complex Decisions and Challenging Situations
As spiritual beings on a human journey, we decided to live a lifetime on this earth to learn lessons that will enable us to grow as souls. Many of the lessons we have chosen require complex decisions and challenging situations that can have a significant impact on the evolvement of not only our souls, but also on the souls of others. Because we are in a stage of learning, and are not all-knowing beings, mistakes will be made. It is important to forgive each other for the mistakes we make and to look beyond the pain to the lessons that are built into the situations we encounter on a daily basis.

Reasons and Choices
In order for our souls to evolve to a clearer understanding of the reasons for our existence, it is necessary to face challenges that make us question and think about our self-worth, our relationships and connections with others, and whether or not there really is a higher power that guides us. The reason you experience tragic, sad, or disheartening events is not to drag you down, but to give you a choice. You can choose to let these situations mire you in negativity and self-pity, or you can choose see the blessings and lessons that God and the angels are assisting you with in order to open your heart, mind, and spirit to the truth that exists within your soul.

Why It Is Beneficial to Forgive
Forgiveness is an acknowledgement and a release of actions from the past that caused harm to yourself or others. Extending forgiveness does not mean that you are condoning the behavior that caused you or others harm. It means that you have come to terms with the situation and have made a conscious decision to release its hold on you. By recognizing that these events served a very important purpose in your soul evolvement, you can also learn how to express gratefulness for the lessons you learned. In order to do that though, you must be able to look beyond the pain in order to see how you were given the opportunity to grow as a soul. The rewards you receive for perceiving the patterns and lessons behind traumatizing events includes amazing enlightenment about yourself, others, and the universe as a whole, as well as a realization that these events were necessary steps toward achieving your dreams in this lifetime.

It is important to note that you do not have to be in someone’s presence in order to forgive them. You can extend forgiveness in your heart and mind by sending forgiving thoughts toward the situation and the people involved. Our connection in spirit with one another allows the messages to be received by the spirit of the person you are forgiving. The people that are here on earth may or may not be consciously aware of your message of forgiveness; however, the spirit that resides within them will have received and acknowledged the forgiveness you have extended.

What Happens When You Refuse to Forgive
Holding grudges, anger, and pain inside of yourself hurts you. Those negative emotions and thoughts prevent you from moving forward and draw toward you more unfortunate circumstances. When you are focused on the lower energies produced by fear and anger, you are dragging down your own energy. This will attract more situations to you that are harmful. By choosing to release negative emotions, you are releasing their hold on you. This will lighten your energetic load and free you up to attract more positive experiences in your life. Keep in mind that how you live your life is your choice. Whether you decide to remain mired in misery or rise above the challenges you face, it is the gift of free will that gives you the option to choose the path that you take.

If you need help extending forgiveness, you can ask the archangels for assistance. They will help you to release the negativity and heal the pain that you have been carrying.

Repetition May Be Necessary
Even after you have extended forgiveness, there may be times when a situation will appear in your life that will bring to the surface old pain and remembrances of harmful situations. When this happens, you can extend forgiveness again and visualize the situation and the people involved as healed.

Choosing to be Free
As you make the choice to free yourself from the past, you are also making the choice to open yourself up to love and more positive experiences. Your spirit will be lighter, and you may even feel as though a physical weight has been lifted from your body. Enjoy the benefits and freedom that comes from releasing your past, and shift your focus to the present—which is full of gifts and opportunities for making positive choices regarding your life path.

Namaste!

With Light and Love,
Karen T. Hluchan
Spirit Medium, Motivational Speaker, Reiki Master, & Author of How Have You Loved?

www.HealingSpiritWithLove.com

The Benefits of Building a Strong Relationship with God

Peace ValleyWhen you build a close relationship with God, you begin to see things through his eyes. It is a bond that is forged in love and nurtured through continual communication and trust. By stepping back and putting your complete faith in God and the outcome of all of your affairs, you are inviting him into your life with loving trust and friendship. As your relationship deepens, you begin to see how God truly does oversee your growth as a soul and how he steers your course as you navigate your way through this lifetime.

Great Plans
God already knows what your goals are and what you are to accomplish while you are here. That was carefully planned with your consent before you were born on this Earth. Your destiny includes a series of soul contracts that define the lessons that you are to learn. How you accomplish them, and if you do, is entirely up to you. Awareness of your contracts, as well as the knowledge that you have gained from a multitude of lifetimes, is masked by the ego when you are born. One of the tasks that we have as a spiritual being on a human journey is to break through the veil that appears to separate us from that knowledge and the universal truths that are accessible through soul communication.

Mistakes can be Beneficial
As we live our lives every day, God lovingly watches over us. He knows the paths our lives are taking and the effects of the choices we make, as well as the best way for us to go. He sees when we deviate from that path. He exerts his power with a loving hand to guide us back to the paths that are in line with our soul plans. As a Spirit in human form, we become frustrated when we see ourselves or others going down a path that will ultimately cause more pain. With God, he views our errors and mistakes as learning lessons. It is beneficial for us to view our setbacks and missteps in the same way. God extends great love and compassion toward our souls. We give ourselves the greatest gift of kindness and love when we extend the same courtesy toward ourselves and others.

Free Will and the Effects of the Ego
As our Creator and heavenly parent, God wants what is best for us. He also knows that as his children, we must be free to make our own choices in order to exist and grow as a spiritual being. That is why we have the gift of free will. Mistakes and errors are as much a part of the process as our greatest achievements. One of the most important aspects of our soul evolvement is to stretch ourselves beyond what we perceive to be our boundaries and limitations. To do that, we need to find the courage that is stored within ourselves to overcome the effects of the ego.

On Earth, we have been given the ego as a part of our human existence. It is the negative voice that challenges our decisions by injecting counterproductive thoughts into our heads. This is the voice of fear that impregnates our mind with doubts and worries. That voice was placed within our minds as a challenge to be overcome. When we elected to come down to Earth to live this lifetime, we did so in order to speed up the evolution of our souls. In Heaven, ego and fear do not exist. We learn lessons for the evolvement of our souls; however, it is from a completely different perspective.

We cannot escape from the ego while on Earth but we can learn to manage it, work with it, and minimize its negative effects. Recognition and acknowledgement of the negative thoughts and fears as an illusion is the first step in negating its effects. When you know within your heart that it is only a mechanism that is meant to challenge you, you can face it with positive determination and thoughts that override its influence.

It is a lifelong challenge to learn how to manage the ego because the ego only disappears completely when our physical bodies expire. However, managing its effects becomes easier over time if you work diligently to recognize its encroachment upon your happiness. We are not meant to live a life of misery, but one of joy and happiness. Our dreams are achievable in this lifetime. The only thing that holds us back are the illusions of fear that are planted there by our egos.

He is with You Always
You are not alone on your journey. God is there to oversee and lovingly direct your path. The best way to hear him is to invite him into your life. Speak with him, pray to him and with him, share your thoughts and your gratitude, ask for guidance, and be open to his answers. God resides within you. He does not punish you with seemingly negative situations. Some circumstances are part of a soul contract while others are the result of how we treat ourselves and others. Negative thoughts and actions ripple across the Earth, causing reactions and events that directly affect our lives. God sees this happening. He intervenes when it is appropriate for him to do so. There are times when lessons need to be learned. At those times, it may seem as though he is not listening or that he is punishing you with hurtful or painful situations. You might even ask “Why doesn’t he save me from this experience?” He may not be removing you from it because, if he did, it may hamper your growth as a soul and hurt you more in the long run.

When you feel that you are in need of assistance, call on God to help you get through the tough situations you face and be open to his guidance. The Archangels are there for you, too. Still the fears within yourself by embracing the love of God and know that he will ensure the best outcome for you. It may not be the outcome you had hoped and prayed for, but then again, maybe it will. Remain calm and feel the peace within your heart that is given with grace to you by God. His love permeates your being at all times. When you push past the negativity of the ego, you can feel love in its purest form. It is a glorious feeling of divine joy that is almost overwhelming in its power. When you experience it, you will know that it is sent to you directly from God.

Enjoy Your Life
As you build your relationship with God, your trust and faith are rewarded with spiritual strength, love, knowledge, and peace. As a result, you may find yourself emulating the very characteristics that God displays toward you, including a significant capacity to extend love, forgiveness, understanding, and compassion toward yourself and others.

My heart has found great peace through my relationship with God and it has transformed my life in ways I never even dreamed were possible. Share your love with God today and let him into your heart. In this way, you can experience the beauty and benefits of your divine relationship with God, our Creator, for yourself.

Namaste!

With Light and Love,
Karen T. Hluchan
Spirit Medium & Reiki Master

www.HealingSpiritWithLove.com

Reacting Positively to Negative Circumstances

Cooperation

A healthy relationship is based on understanding, cooperation, and communication.

We were put here on this earth to help each other. Not everyone understands this concept. Turmoil erupts when fear overtakes emotions, driving people to take action based on such negative emotions as jealousy, greed, and selfishness. Instead of responding in kind with anger, we can break the chain of negativity by countering such behavior with understanding and kindness.

It is very challenging at times to counter negativity with positive actions because our own shock and pain need to be dealt with before we can proceed. Sometimes our first instinct is to lash out at the person or people who hurt us. If anger or pain is coloring your thoughts, take a few steps back from the source of the negativity. Look at the situation from all points of view through an honest assessment of the behaviors of both you and the party involved that led to the problem. Come up with ideas for solutions that would create the most positive resolutions for everyone involved.

First and foremost, be honest with yourself and the other person or people involved. Set up a time to talk about the situation from a standpoint of trying to resolve it in the most positive way for all. Present your ideas, actively listen to the feedback you receive, work through the issue by allowing each person to express their thoughts, and do your best to move past the problem. Remember to extend forgiveness and to release the issue, knowing that it has been resolved.

If in your contemplation or discussions, you realize that the best solution would be to end the relationship due to unreconcilable differences, bring it to close with kindness, grace, and honor. Wish them well, pray for their health and happiness, and move on with your life.

When you have your own moments of behaving badly, apologize to the person you hurt. Let them know that you are sorry and mean it by not repeating the same negative or hurtful behavior. This will go a long way toward mending your relationship. Forgive yourself, too. We are all human and make mistakes. But to be a better person, we need to learn from our mistakes and we need to treat ourselves and others with kindness.

Try to be the best person that you can be despite the turmoil around you. Take the high road and choose to counter negative situations with positive reactions. We cannot control all of the events that occur in our lives, nor can we control the behaviors of others. We can control our own actions and reactions, though, and decide to look beyond the negative behaviors of others by displaying understanding, kindness and grace in the face of adversity and turmoil. By doing so, you will notice the peace and calm in your own life. At the same time, you will be showing others that fears and turmoil are often based on misunderstandings that can be resolved, or even prevented, with compassion and empathy. In this way, we fulfill our soul contracts to help each other as we live our lives on this earth.

With Light and Love,
Karen T. Hluchan

www.HealingSpiritWithLove.com